You should give your relationship some more advance. The complex personality, which seems to be a distant attraction, seems to have started to push you early in a close relationship. There must be something you must do.
You look at your applications selectively so that they do not suit your circumstances. You will receive news from the end of your preference order, but still say it is a door of hope.
It is very clear that you will not be able to level up without finishing your business problem. But you should not be upset, your references are very reassuring. The days when you will take a safer job and get rid of money problems are not far away.
While looking into the future with hope, some pessimism may be useful to you. There may be situations where you mix imagination and optimism.